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  • Writer's pictureJoia

Today's rhaps is a ... Letter From My Cat

Updated: Sep 30, 2023


Mona Edulesco, Cubist Colorful Cat, c 2013

So no, I'm not interested in your virtual bird reality, stupid cat videos, wtf is virtual reality anyway, the latest twist on Plato's shadows dancing on the wall of a cave? Your species is the one hung up on Appearances and Reality, not mine, you've been talking about it for thousands of years now. We do just fine with the External World, thank you very much. We evolved to fit exactly this environment, which, by the way, your species is totally messing up for all of us. And why is that? We're not the ones burning fossil fuels and driving SUVs, we're not pumping ozone into the atmosphere. In fact, we don't own the corporations that do muck everything up for everybody, we don't go to Glascow to pretend we care and make dumb promises to fix it—blah-blah as Greta says—nor do we siphon off stocks from their uberwealthy stakeholders to fund our retirements all over the world...well okay, I guess you do purchase my hypoallergenic Royal Canin food and my fancy silica sand box with said retirement funds, so hmmm, maybe I'm kinda sorta involved in this after all...but not by choice! Absolutely not! Really, I would not be here if you hadn't rescued me from the damn Fundação shelter, well uh, I guess without you and your kind I'd probably still be out there running wild, maybe out there speed-running on the savannah somewhere, hey, I might even be out there chasing you! Running you down for my dinner, how 'bout that? Ha! Hmm, okay, about dinner, uh...maybe, well...okay...where were those bird videos?

Lexus ruminating

8 November 2021

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